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You Must Be This Ignorant To Ride

By Alan Hindle

Wednesday May 30, 2007

The first Creationist Museum/Amusement Park has opened in Midwestern America. Huzzah for the burgeoning field of Scientisticalness! The 60,000 foot complex, designed by a former Universal Studios Theme Park director, today welcomes the public and offers to install in them the truth of Intelligent Design over flimsy evolution theory, as only a theme park can.

The $27M museum boasts “A fully engaging, sensory experience for guests. Murals and realistic scenery, computer-generated visual effects, over fifty exotic animals, life-sized people and dinosaur animatronics, and a special-effects theater complete with misty sea breezes and rumbling seats. These are just some of the impressive exhibits that everyone in your family will enjoy.”