ONLY: Did you get anything good today at Value Village?
Haley: No, I was looking for an RF Modulator for my ghetto TV and didn’t find anything.
ONLY: RF modulator, I don’t even know what that is. What’s the coolest thing you’ve ever bought?
H: A series of Jacques Cousteau books about exploring the sea.
ONLY: Is exploring the sea a hobby or career related?
H: Fantasy, I’m an accountant.
ONLY: What’s your favorite part about being an accountant?
H: The fact that everything adds up at the end of the day, and I get to sit on my ass.
ONLY: Would you rather do that or be an ocean explorer?
H: You’d get to wear sweet swimsuits and drive an awesome ocean explorer, but I don’t really like swimming that much.
ONLY: So you’d rather be an accountant?
H: I had to set aside all those sea dreams when I dedicated my life to numbers.
ONLY: Wow, you’re kind of like a superhero.
H: Yup, I know.