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Credit Check: Remember, Remember

By only

Monday May 12, 2008

- 2 Let’s see… There was that fatal, dual SUV shooting thingamabob on Kingsway, that probably sucked. Where do you buy an automatic weapon anyway? Want.

+1 There’s a chap in Surrey named Fabio that doesn’t want his last name published. Oh, and website. Crime website.

±0 One MLA (guess which riding, it’s fun!) lives in a town that deserves to know what’s in their sugar-free gum and perogy. Hate to fart on your quinoa Greg, but there’s just too much fluffy shit going on right now. Try again after Stanley Park grows back, or when all the plastic bags have been vanquished.

- 1 Someone maybe might have cut down the power at the Richmond Night Market. They can’t really say for sure who the lumberjack is, but just for safe measure: Racist! Why fuck with a cheap bubble tea? Cheap flip-flops, c’mon.

±0 If you are one of them sensitive sexual predator types, then you’re kicking yourself if you didn’t show up at the Metro Vancouver Zoo with a four-pack of steaming hot chamomile tea yesterday for that Jocko the Spider Monkey memorial. There was all kinds of vulnerable mourning action up in there. Seriously though, “He always made little kissy noises–he was such a little ladies’ man,” Prasad said with a sad smile. Jocko would’ve wanted you to be there.

Today: - 2 This Year: - 189