Conrad Black Gets Sentenced to 6 1/2 Years In Prison, Has Smoking Hot Daughter

By Chuck Ansbacher

Monday December 10, 2007

Former media baron Conrad Black was sentenced to six-and-a-half years in prison today for fraud, obstruction of justice and blah blah blah blah blah… Check out how completely on fire his daughter is! She’s like Cher if Cher were 25 again and had awesome style and way better bangs and legs and didn’t sing about life existing after love but instead was waay more awesome, more hot and more Canadian. Eeew. Cher. Yeah, we know. Anyways, Alana Black (memorize it) is sure to be in a serious bout of brooding, mysterious depression as she watches her father get whisked off to jail. Book a flight to Toronto, and put those pimpin’ skills you learned watching Hitch to the test.