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Monday April 7, 2008


There Will Be Blood
Yes, indeed there will be. But not until the last three minutes of the surprising, kind of tacked-on ending of an otherwise perfect film.

Walk Hard:The Dewey Cox Story
In 2007 Judd Apatow smeared his magical pap all over some of the best films of the year, and although this was not his strongest penmanship to date, it’s still pretty fucking funny. Well, at least the second twenty minutes are. Starring the multi-awesomed John C Reilly (aka Dr Steve Brule from Tim & Eric Awesome Show) and Jenna Fischer (Pam from The U.S. Office), Walk Hard is essentially a “fuck your weepy tears” to all the sob-fest music biopics that have been released in the last few years. With lyrics that go “In my dreams you’re blowing me… some kisses,” and starring a gent whom IMDB describes as “homely” (no lie), if you can stay awake and get past all the really dumb random cameos (the only noteworthy one being Jack White as Elvis) you’ll probably not hate this movie.

Lions for Lambs
Oh yeah Tom Cruise? “Do you want to win the War on Terror? Yes or no?” Is that really the defining question of our time? Because one could also argue that “Are you gay?” is already the defining question of our time… Actually no, that’s not true, Tom Cruise is obviously not gay. If you’re one of those Anonymous weirdos who’s been walking around all tough going “Tom Cruise is gay, aliens exist, blah blah blah,” then earth to you, because you’re the gay one, and not Tom Cruise. The only reason you’re afraid of Tom Cruise and gay people is that you’re actually gay, and you fear what you don’t understand, which is yourself.

Manda Bala: Send a Bullet
What do kidnapping, corrupt politicians and plastic surgery all have in common? Easy. Brazil. Director Jason Kohn weaves together a punch in the face documentary that is disturbing, sexy, hilarious and shocking all at the same time, and manages to get interviews with both a balaclava wearing cop killing-kidnapping-drug dealer and a super evil, corrupt politician. In interviews, Kohn states he was more scared of the politician. That says a lot. Probably our favourite documentary of last year, it gets under your skin and reveals how corruption and poverty have indelibly converged to create a violent culture fueled by an us vs. them philosophy.

It’s hard to know who the star of this documentary is. Is it the sharks, or director, cinematographer and narrator Rob Stewart? When we went to the Vancouver Aquarium to interview Rob about this movie, we were surprised at just how pretty he is. What with his tanned skin and shark tooth necklace, there was no denying Stewart is definitely this year’s Ocean Saving “it” man. But truthfully, the movie is pretty powerful and despite his good looks, Stewart makes the undeniably important point which, unless you are living on the moon or in Alberta, you should all know by now. We are totally fucking up the oceans.