Channels 3 + 4

By only

Friday April 29, 2005

You Don’t Have To If You Don’t Want To

So it’s obviously pretty tacky to interview your own band. Don’t think I didn’t realise that prior to setting this up. One thing I didn’t realize is that it would turn into a band fight ending in raised voices and tears. Whatevs, it’s no different from every practice and show we have, I guess. Vancouver pretty much hates us, so stroking ourselves in Only seems to be the only way we’ll ever get any press. At least I’m not writing about my boyfriend’s band…Uhh. Or my ex-girlfriend/business partner’s band.

ONLY: Well what do you think, Jes? You don’t have to do it if you don’t want.

Jesse Nobody: I don’t know, I just still find it pretty weird. I feel bad because there are other bands that could be in the paper… Hot Loins is playing…

ONLY: Hot Loins are in the Terminal City this week. When was the last time we were in a paper? I don’t think it’s too unreasonable.
(Long silence)

Nic Fit: I don’t know, interviews are weird for me.
J: I seriously think that you should just write this as the interview because this is all gold material.

ONLY: Ok, fine. I will.

J: This stuff is interesting.

ONLY: (Laughs) Not really.

N: Alright, let’s just try something. Do you have to have this finished tonight?

ONLY: Yeah. Should we just start?

J: It doesn’t matter.

ONLY: Well it seems like it matters.

J: I think that you and Nic should just do it. I did the last interview by my self.
N: They probably won’t even know who we are if you’re not in it.
J: Fuck that.
N: Seriously. Everybody knows that you’re in the band. But will people know that I’m in the band?
J: Oh yeah. That’s so ridiculous.
N: I don’t care. I’m not saying that I want to be you or anything like that. I’m just saying that that’s what I observe.
J: Fuck that.

ONLY: Well I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to do. (Long silence) So… How was tour?

N: Disastrous. Overwhelming. Financial Overload. Undertow. But we met lots of nice people.
J: No comment.
N: No purses.

ONLY: Your purse got stolen?

N: My Murse.

ONLY: What happened to the brown sequined gloves that were in your murse?

N: I forgot them drying on Jenny’s sink where I was washing the piss out of them.

ONLY: Why haven’t we released the recording that Johnny Jewel did yet?

N: Because it’s absolutely fucking terrible. (Laughs)
J: I thought we did put out a hundred copies with two different cover designs and hours of fighting.

ONLY: I was thinking that your DJ name should be Jesse Depressee.

N: Depressee? Depressee Junior High?
J: I’ll never DJ in my life.

ONLY: You’re DJing as we speak.

N: You DJed at Lugz. Remember, Sonic Youth night?
J: No.
N: Comment.

ONLY: How do people in Vancouver feel about Channels 3 and 4?

J: Nobody cares.
N: We’re so 2003… slash 2004

ONLY: Bakelite told me that I’m the manliest person in the band.

N: Yeah.
J: Well you know what, Bakelite are fucking Mormons.

Channels 3 and 4 are playing at the Music Waste benefit show with Hot Loins, Christa Min and Fun 100, Friday April 29, 2005 at the Lamplighter and at 156 W. Hastings with Book of Lists on Saturday