VANCOUVER

Monday, April 24, 2017

° » 5 day

Because we have been waiting for you for a decade

Haley

HALEY RETKA IS AN ACCOUNTANT. SHE IS 20.

ONLY: Did you get anything good today at Value Village?

Haley: No, I was looking for an RF Modulator for my ghetto TV and didn’t find anything.

ONLY: RF modulator, I don’t even know what that is. What’s the coolest thing you’ve ever bought?

H: A series of Jacques Cousteau books about exploring the sea.

ONLY: Is exploring the sea a hobby or career related?

H: Fantasy, I’m an accountant.

ONLY: What’s your favorite part about being an accountant?

H: The fact that everything adds up at the end of the day, and I get to sit on my ass.

ONLY: Would you rather do that or be an ocean explorer?

H: You’d get to wear sweet swimsuits and drive an awesome ocean explorer, but I don’t really like swimming that much.

ONLY: So you’d rather be an accountant?

H: I had to set aside all those sea dreams when I dedicated my life to numbers.

ONLY: Wow, you’re kind of like a superhero.

H: Yup, I know.

  1. Internet Sleuth

    Random interview, eh? Well, I guess it’s just a random coincidence that the author and the subject BOTH appear here the BIG lie

    My world has been destroyed. I thought all of these were off the cuff remarks from totally cool people instead of calculated, pre-thought out responses.

    And an “accountant” at 20? It’s called a bookkeeper Haley, and that’s what you is. Bookkeeper’s a better title – three sets of letter pairs in one word!

    - Apr 29, 11:55 PM

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