Tuesday, March 19, 2019

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Because we have been waiting for you for a decade

The 2010 Onlympics. Because It Might Be The Last Thing We Ever Do.

Time: Friday, Feb. 12, 2010. We’ll begin annoying you sometime around 5:30pm
Where: The Official 2010 Onlympics Media Gondola Overlooking Beautiful Downtown Vancouver
How: By watching the interactive experience we’re building. A link will be posted HERE as soon as we get it done.
Why: Because we’re going to need a few drinks to make it through the next couple of weeks.

No, Really. Why?
Back in the year of 2004 or maybe it was 2003? Honestly, we’re not quite sure, but let’s just say about 1400 days ago we built the first ever widget for the Mac OS that would count down the days leading to a riot that at that time we thought was sure to happen when the 2010 Olympic Games opened in the city of Vancouver.

We laughed at the unimaginable bulk of days that lay ahead, thousands of them. We built the widget, got a bit drunk, ate some pasta, installed the thing on our dashboards, passed out, and quite honestly; forgot about it.

While we went on with our lives that little widget, which was a smaller and much cheaper version of the big doomsday machine that they installed outside the Vancouver Art Gallery, kept ticking down the days to what we predicted was going to be mayhem. With each passing day the hopes and dreams that we could get blamed for the 2010 Olympic riot and maybe even spend a night or two in jail, just like when the staff of Only Magazine was blamed for the 1994 Stanley Cup Riot and nearly arrested, began to slowly fade away into distant memory.

Well, ladies and gentleman, the unimaginable has happened. The unstoppable element known as time has brought us to the door of the 2010 Opening Ceremonies this coming Friday and while the doomsday machine is about to pop a series of zeros, and our little widget becomes a useless relic, the staff of Only Magazine care about one thing only. And that’s to bring you the cutting edge in new media journalism…and FUCKING PARTY! So make that two things we care about.

Riot? meh. Whatever. So much has happened in the years that have passed: lottery windfalls won and spent, the disappearance of one of our beloved editors, several going away parties, even more “I’m back, broke and broken” parties, the creation of offices in Toronto, London, and New York, and parties in just about every exotic city you can think of, like Winnipeg, for example. There have been break ups for pizza, sexting back and forth, hookups, hang-ups, breakdowns and coming outs. Babies have been born and Hulk Hogan wrote a book. All the while the 2010 countdown clock has kept its time, relentlessly tick tocking down to 0:0:0. And us? Well, we’ve been training.

What we’re getting at is that we don’t really care anymore. Vancouver is OUR sweetheart, or first love, and she can do whatever the hell she wants. So riot or no riot we will we be hunkered down in the Official Only Magazine Media Gondola overlooking beautiful downtown Vancouver, and having a party. We’ll keep and eye on our girl and see how she rides this night out. We’re inviting all of our friends over and we’re going to get wasted and liveblog the shit out of the Opening Ceremonies. We’ll have our Only satellite offices in Toronto, New York and London provide insight into this event from an International perspective.

The opening ceremonies of any Olympics is always ridiculous, so we’ll be pairing that ridiculousness with an equally retarded spectacle over Robson Street. We’ll be turning the whole party into one big, multi-stream broadcast, beamed in over the net from the 2010 Onlympics Media Gondola Overlooking Beautiful Downtown Vancouver. There will be games, party snacks, celebrities in attendance, uniforms, and someone will probably try to have sex with the fridge again. Yes, it’s happened. And finally, let’s not forget the wonderful insight that you’ve come to trust from the team at Only Magazine. Even if we don’t care anymore.

Seriously, it’s not as if you’ll be able to go anywhere, so you might as well come hang out with us. See you then.

  1. Zoe

    Fucking right on!

    - Feb 8, 09:53 pm

  2. Zoe

    I am SO THERE.

    - Feb 10, 10:46 pm

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