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Wednesday April 30, 2008

By Chuck Ansbacher

Wednesday April 30, 2008

FILM
People, the night is upon us. For a few months we tried our gosh darndest to put on a successful movie night at the Astoria, pretty much to zero avail. But tonight, a movie night at said venue that we have absolutely zero part in putting together is sure to PACK the place. Why? Because this city is full of geeks! That, and it’s an original, new Star Trek film put together solely by local heroes over the course of… um, yeah, just read our interview with the dudes. Go to the Astoria tonight. Dress up. It’s gonna be a Trekkie shindig the likes of which this city has never seen before. Chains of Betrayal! Better title than both the new Indiana Jones AND James Bond movies, divided by eleven! Eat it, Shittywood.
Tonight at the Astoria at 9pm SHARP.


MUSIC
What are you? Some anti-Trekkite? Yeah? Really? Well, good. Good for you, ignorant stupid. Fortunately, there is a convention to your liking pulling into the station tonight. Queens of the Stone Age are playing at THE BEST venue in town… The PNE Forum! All together now, “FINALLY!” If for some reason you’ve been dying to drone out with a couple hundred really pumped dudes who look exactly like Charlie from Lost, God is listening, and she’s spreading his mayonnaisey goodness all over your confused bosom this very evening. Plus, the acoustics are phenom… Um, snootchie-bootchies? Exactly.