VANCOUVER

Thursday, March 23, 2017

° » 5 day

Because we have been waiting for you for a decade

AZ, Elf Power, Does It Offend You, Yeah?, and The Sword

AZ – Undeniable
If you’ve read our reviews before, then you already know how this goes. We are going to give AZ’s Undeniable a good review because it is rap. Because all the other non-rap albums we had to review this week were particularly questionable, we’re going to give it an even better review then we normally would. And regardless of whether or not it is legitimately good, we recommend that you go out and buy this now; Or iTunes it, or whatever people do these days. We guarantee you are going to love “Parking Lot Pimpin‘”. Either way, did you think we would write anything negative about an album that quotes Spike Lee and Sean Combs?




Elf Power – In A Cave
Meg: I wish I was in a cave.

Jeph: Deep.

Meg: Yeah, I know. In grade nine, an older boy once asked me if I ever had deep thought, ‘cos of how he had a deep thoughts club in Port Moody that he wanted me to join.

Jeph: That’s weird that you mentioned grade nine, because this band formed when I was in grade nine. Which was apparently fourteen years ago. I didn’t know that they formed then from experience. Fourteen years ago I’m pretty sure I was just into Green Day’s Dookie and Moxy Früvous’ Bargainville.

Meg: Wow. You’re so old. I’m pretty sure that I was just into trying to get to second.




Does It Offend You, Yeah? – You Have No Idea What You’re Getting Yourself Into
Before you get all accusatory, and assume that Does It Offend You, Yeah? was going for some lame shock-value thing with their band name, we’ll have you know that their name actually comes from a Ricky Gervais quote from The Office… Nothing lame about that (except that it’s a bad name for a band). But speaking of this album, with the incredibly long album title, it’s 50% Daft Punk B-sides and 50% horrible.




The Sword – Gods of the Earth
Jeph: I really like the stuff that metal bands like this one write about: Giants and ancient Hyperborian races and stuff (not that those particular subjects are covered on this album), but I think people are just kidding themselves when they say they actually like listening to metal. I wish people would write awesome metal lyrics about mystical warriors and stuff for modern folk and rap songs. That would be a lot better.

Meg: I grew up in Maple Ridge and I can honestly say that people that like metal are not kidding. In fact, they’re usually very serious.

Jeph: Like those Scandinavian black metal guys that burn down churches and stuff? Serious stuff. Serious stuff. Definitely. I more meant the sorts of people that have decent taste in music but then say they like a few metal bands too. Those guys have gotta be joking.

Meg: Yeah, probably.

  1. cam

    i listen to metal… and i’m kinda wondering what the logic is behind your argument that no one with decent taste can actually enjoy it

    - Mar 29, 07:23 PM

  2. Allan

    While I don’t listen to metal (does Lightning Bolt count?) and I totally understand your suspicion that music that takes itself as seriously as metal does, should disallow anyone with decent taste from enjoying it.

    - Mar 31, 04:12 PM

  3. cam

    yes, that is completely fair to say that metal takes itself very seriously because for alot of its fans its just as much a lifestyle as it is a genre but at the same time there’s plenty of people who love and play metal that don’t take it too seriously and who don’t make it seem like some sacred cow that can never be touched. just because alot of people who enjoy it are diehard nutjobs shouldn’t discredit the genre as a whole. and couldn’t this same argument be made for punk as a whole as well? possibly even more so

    - Mar 31, 06:20 PM

  4. bizzo

    What lifestyle is that? The Metal lifestyle?

    - Mar 31, 06:45 PM

  5. Allan

    That lifestyle where all of your shirts are long-sleeved and have really hard to read writing on them (not graf though), and the band names end in -eth or -iria, and you wear black cargo pants and army boots and live in a shitty house with six other guys with the same outfit, and you eat a lot of frozen pizzas?
    I’m sure there is more to this (reading Alexander Crawley, figuring out the math behind pentagrams etc.), but I’m a very visual person and this is what I have noticed and judged from afar.

    Now that I think about it, my lifestyle ain’t that hot shit, as it includes a lot of riding the bus to work and back and staring out my window, but at least my outfits are tight!

    - Mar 31, 07:40 PM

  6. cam

    ok, yeah, lifestyle wasn’t exactly the right word. maybe should’ve said its more like a religion for some people in that its the only thing they listen to and the only thing they believe in as far as music is concerned.

    can i ask why people seem to feel the need to poke fun at/look down on metal so much though. what did metal ever do to you?

    - Mar 31, 07:55 PM

  7. cam

    ok, yeah, lifestyle wasn’t exactly the right word. maybe i should’ve said its more like a religion for some people in that its the only thing they listen to and the only thing they believe in as far as music is concerned.

    can i ask why people seem to feel the need to poke fun at/look down on metal so much though? what did metal ever do to you?

    - Mar 31, 07:57 PM

  8. Metaldeath

    @ Allan: You mean Aleister Crowley? Idiot.

    Also, a person can appreciate metal as much as experimental noise or punk or classical or whatever. And far as I can tell there is generally a lifestyle cliche attached to any genre of music. It doesn’t necessarily negate that music or the lifestyle that the two are tied together.

    - Apr 1, 06:46 PM

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